choosing is so...

.choice.choose.
to decide : it is the harderst thing of life!

what a lovely morning,
when i have to wake up and think of what am i suppose to be choosing for my degree.
i am so messed up thinking of what future brings.
being so brought up i started to think of the reality of life.
about bits and pieces of life that usually will be nice to talk about,
but not really nice to face up alone.

i am started to think and think and think.
where should i put myself belongs to?
where should i place this soul so that the feelings of peace and bliss will always remains in?
where should i gather this body and mind to be in the right destiny that ends with smile?
well then, i started to remind myself.
we may have the power to plan, to arrange or to dream...

but...
it will happen if it is meant to happen and if it has stated to happen.
but,
there is something that we can change about it, right?
like by working hard to gain extra income?
or by being smart to choose and not to be stab?
so, i got to say yes,
we may not have the fully power to make things happen as we plan,
but at least we try.
i may not be good,
but at least i tried.
i guess..
the effort that counts.

so here, i am what i am.

A Sad Love Story

One night a guy and girl were driving home after a movie. The boy sensed there was something wrong because of the painful silence they shared between them that night. The girl then asked the boy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed and that it was time to move on.

A silent tear slid down his cheek as he slowly reached into his pocket and passed her a folded note. At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. He swerved right into the drivers seat, killing the boy.

Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she pulled it out and read it.

" Without your love, I would die."

Imperfect

I were, I was and I am a type of person who tend to follow what is written and to avoid what is forbidden. For me, life is all about obeying the rules, life is about being punctual, life is about being round or square.

Always stand on the left lane on escalator, never cut the queue, say only necessary things, be at least 10 minutes early then the stated time, never reuse body towel, never forget to flush the toilet or being so lame by only drinking blue cap mineral water.

For me, that is life. With rules and very tight principle that I drew for me to follow on my own. Maybe this happened because I was brought up by a very strict mother who were, was, are a perfectionist. Yet, I was a very naughty young girl back then. It is so enjoyable to against each rules. It was so fantastic to get scolded because of being so disobey. But yet, when I grown up, I tend to find perfection in almost everything. I may be not as beautiful as you, or you or even you. But yet, there is something else deeper that I am trying to say here.

But the point here is, I am tired of being one. I am tired of getting things to be as what it should be. I am tired of getting things back to what it belongs. I am tired of being me. Tried hard yet failed (maybe it is not hard enough).

Well here 2009! Welcome and please shine the days. Please solve the unsolved. Please settle the unsettled. But, will it gets back to what it was before? Things changed, people changed. But yet, when will I change?

:: Objection Is The Key Of Determination ::